Marriage is an interesting thing. You pledge to spend the rest of your life with this person, in sickness and health, no matter what. But I wonder how many people really think through the reality of the person they’re about to spend the rest of their life with. You see, we all have our foibles, our habits that annoy anyone around us, and things that make us whiny. In the blush of infatuation, that all feels very minor but as time goes on, they start to feel very real and the secret to a successful marriage is, in my view, finding ways to not let them drive you crazy.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not talking about the big stuff and I’m not headed on a rant against my husband. He’s a great guy and has fewer annoying habits than most people I know. I’m talking about me.
You see, I don’t get sick that often. And when I do, I don’t usually get all that sick. Which is surprising, considering that I have a couple of chronic health conditions that could make the whole situation a lot worse. But when I do get sick, I get grumpy and whiny.
Like yesterday. I woke up with a sinus problem brewing. I hate this. It’s a fairly common occurrence but truthfully, compared to big scary illnesses like heart disease or cancer, it’s a minor annoyance. Still, it made me not want to work, not want to knit, just want to go to bed, hide under the covers and sleep until it goes away. But you see, I can’t. People depend on me to get things done and in some ways, that’s a good thing. It made me get up and face the day (albeit armed with the contents of a small pharmacy).
And, by this time, I’ve already whined to my husband by cell phone because he’s on a business trip. And when he got home, I whined some more and was grumpy on top of it. And despite the fact that this has to drive HIM crazy, he was his usual patient, kind self. You see, my husband is a man of his word. When he said ‘in sickness and health,’ he meant it. And apparently in whinyness too. That’s a good thing.
So if there’s anything I can draw from this little bit of domesticated bliss, it’s this. I’m going to try to be less grumpy and whiny. And I’m also going to work on being more patient with others I encounter who are grumpy or whiny. Sometimes you find role models in interesting places, even in your own house. Thanks, honey, for the life lesson.